


Soul Spark

by QueenVee1



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Darcyland, Drabble, Drabble Collection, F/M, Gen, Infinity Gems, Infinity Stones, Marvel - Freeform, Multi, OT3, WinterShieldShock - Freeform, drabble-a-thon, mcu - Freeform, thanos - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-09 14:31:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 14,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11670963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenVee1/pseuds/QueenVee1
Summary: If Darcy Lewis had a superpower, she figured it would be that she is willing to do stupid things. That definitely includes jumping in the middle of a fight she can't win, to help people she doesn't really know, by grabbing something she doesn't really understand. What's the worst that could happen, right?Everything.Everything is the worst that could happen.





	1. 62 %

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. So I’m taking part in the @fuckyeahdarcylewis tumblr [DarcyLand Drabble Challenge](http://fuckyeahdarcylewis.tumblr.com/post/163364616782/fckyeahdarcylewis-drabble-a-thon-extravaganza) , because I love Darcy, and love the Fandom, and I wanted a challenge. 100-1000word drabble for 15 days. Because I’m a glutton for punishment, I’m going to shoot for 1000word each day, making a cool 15K fic. And because I love pain as well, I’m going to attempt to make it into one, over arching storyline.
> 
> I promise I did not start on ANY of this before today. EVEN THE ART was made today.
> 
> I am ridiculous.
> 
> Today’s VERY WORTHY CHARITY and my favorite of choice is [Best Friends Animal Sanctuary](http://bestfriends.org/). They took in the Michael Vick dogs when no one else would, and they didn’t put them down. They took them, for life. That’s how awesome this place is. I LOVE IT. DONATE.
> 
> Anyway. Here’s wonderwall…

Darcy Lewis grunted when the shock wave slammed into her body. She squinted against the blast of air, glancing over at Jane, eyes wide with fear. "Jane!?"

" _I know!_ " Jane screamed, reaching out to grab Darcy's hand. "Just hold on!"

Pulling herself as close to Jane as she could, Darcy threw her arms around her friend's waist and held on for dear life. This was bad, _fuck_ this was so bad. "What's the possibility we die?"

"I don't know, Darcy!"

She could hear the terror in Jane's voice as they looked at the softly glowing stone that had hit the ground in front of them. It looked like it was made of the brightest amber and Darcy could see things inside it swirling. She remembered Jane mentioning something about important stones, the kind of important that only the Avengers (with their powers and strength and ability to _not be terrified every fucking minute_ ) could handle... yet there it was, beautiful and terrifying, sitting right in front of them.

Needing something to draw her attention, to keep from pissing herself in fear, Darcy shook Jane roughly. "I need a percentage!"

" _What?_ "

The fighting continued, a blur of bodies and pain and blast of lights and lasers. Both women screamed when something scorched the ground in front of them, leaving a line of charred dirt. If it was symbolic of some kind of line they were about to cross ( _fuck, she was so bad at crossing lines!_ ), then Darcy chose stubbornly to ignore it. "Give me a number! How likely are we about to die?"

"What are you talking about?! Ah!"

An energy blast threw them backward and into the air, both losing their breath as they hit the side of a panel van, complete with a horrible painting of a skull covered in flames, holding a flaming chain and wearing a leather jacket. _How Tacky._

Darcy could taste blood in her mouth. She was going to die. She was going to die, now for _no_ college credits, and all because the fight had stumbled onto their doorstep. She was scared, her was heart racing, and some small part of her couldn't help but think _this is what you get for trying to hang out with people who are cooler than you._

She coughed, rolling in the dirt, watching as Jane did the same. "Janey..." She could see tears on Jane's face, her eyes wide and desperate as she looked in the carnage for Thor, losing hope that he was still alive out there. She needed a distraction, and that was something Darcy had been called her entire life. _Just a distraction._

"Jane Foster, what percentage are we looking at? One-hundred? Fifty? Two? Just give me something!"

The astrophysicist looked at her, the terror evident in Jane's eyes filling Darcy with a steel resolve. "I don't know!"

"Jane!" Darcy shook her shoulders harder, "give me a damn number!"

"Uh... I don't..." Jane let out a sob, " **sixty-two percent**!"

Sixty-two percent. If Jane's math was correct, and it always was, there was a sixty-two percent chance that she'd never have another cup of coffee. She’d never pet another dog. She’d never kiss someone who was completely wrong for her but felt so right. It fucking sucked, knowing that her time was ending, and Darcy didn't like the feeling at all.

Her hazel eyes glanced upward, watching the fight rage around them. She could make out a few familiar sights in the melee; a glint of crimson and gold, the shine of chrome, a blur of green and purple, a flash of red, white and blue. She almost cried when she saw the spark of lightning in the mix, _knowing_ that it was Thor and _knowing_ , with all her heart, that he and Jane belonged together, that they were destined to make super hot giant Norse God babies.

This was all wrong.

They were losing, and she knew it. They were going to die, despite everything, they were all going to die, and all over some stupid ugly gems that wouldn't even look good in costume jewelry? "You know what? _Fuck this_."

Darcy climbed to her feet, clutching at her ribs. She couldn't take a full breath without a stabbing pain. Fractures? Probably. She'd never had any so she couldn't say for sure. But she hurt, was exhausted, and was just _so over everything_ that her idea seemed like the best thing at the time. She'd probably come to regret it, but she thought about a lot of things in her life, and they'd led her here, right here, so maybe it was all for a reason.

"Tick your percentage up to a hundred for me, kay?"

"What?"

"If you have a girl and don't name her after me, I'll come back and haunt your ass!"

"Darcy, wait!"

She didn't listen to Jane, taking a few stumbling steps until she broke into an all out run. She was stupid, so stupid, but she didn't have any super powers. Maybe this was hers.

Stupidity.

Stupidity on a scale never seen in this galaxy. Right before her fingers closed around the glowing amber gem, Darcy shut her eyes and threw a prayer into the Universe.

_Please let this matter, David Bowie, just let this matter._

Jane screamed, arm stretching out toward Darcy as if she could stop her, shielding her eyes when a blast of orange light erupted from her friend, blinding her.

A hush fell over the battlefield. Everyone turned their heads, wounded and panting, watching as the body of a young woman began to hover above the ground, dark hair swirling and eyes burning with amber light. The man with purple skin screamed and took a running leap at her. Her hand rose, the simple word 'no' forming on her lips. Everyone watched as the man evaporated into ash, orange electricity sparking through the air.

No one moved. No one breathed. Finally, in the silence, the woman smiled softly. "Neat."

Then everything went black.


	2. Dreamer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm highlighting the prompt word for each day when it's used in the scene.
> 
> Today's charity of awesomely awesomeness? [The Wounded Warrior Project](https://www.woundedwarriorproject.org/). Wounded Warrior Project is a military and veterans charity service organization empowering injured veterans and their families. It's needed, and so important, and if even one person makes a donation because of this story, it'd have all been worth it.
> 
> Now onto the words!

There was music playing somewhere, something soft and gentle and in the other room. She was warm, and calm, and she felt _great_. Like ‘I’ve just spent a weekend in a day spa being pampered and eating whatever I want because calories don’t count’ great. Had she ever felt this great? She didn’t think so.

“Darcy?”

She frowned. That wasn’t her name. Was it? It didn’t sound right as she said it to herself. “ _Darcy_.”

“Darcy, can you hear me?”

No. She wanted to go back to the spa and the zero-calorie cheesecake. She wanted to stay here, a **dreamer** , adrift on a sea of happiness and fluffy towels. Suddenly, memories began to flood back into her, crashing against her mind like a tsunami. _Ow, damn it._

“There is no Darcy, ‘s only Zuul.” When she heard a sob, Darcy carefully squinted open one eye. She watched Jane, her beautiful best friend Jane, crying softly against Thor’s chest. “Hey, Big Guy, whatdja do?”

“Wasn’t him, Freaks and Geeks. What on _Earth_ made you grab that stone?”

That voice was new, she thought, turning her gaze from Thor - who was giving her a really weird look - to Tony Stark. “What stone?”

“ _The_ stone. The stone to end all stones?”

“Was it a Rolling Stone? Richards, perhaps?” Her joke didn’t earn the laughs she thought it deserved, but she watched as Stark rolled his eyes and took a step back from her.

“We’re not sure how you did it, but you absorbed one of the infinity stones.”

Darcy’s rolled her cheek onto the pillow, grin widening when she saw Steve Rogers, Captain Freaking America, sitting at her bedside. “I know you. You punched Hitler.” The small grin he gave her made her chest flutter all funny. But that could have been something else, as when she closed her eyes, she could _still_ feel the fluttering and it didn’t appear to be stopping. “Wha…”

She sat up suddenly, hearing several chairs screech across the floor as their occupants scrambled backward from her. Her hands were crackling with orange energy. Not lightning, not electricity, but swirls of brilliant amber light. “That’s… new. What happened to me?”

“We’re still not sure,” a man with rumpled clothes said as he came closer. “We need to run tests, see if you’ve had changes at a cellular level. If something in your DNA has been altered, we could use the information to determine what kind of abilities to expect.”

“Abilities?” Darcy’s eyes widened and she looked over at Jane. “Am I going to die?”

Jane started to take a step toward her, but Thor held her back with a hand at her elbow. “No, Darce, no. You’re going to be fine.” 

At Jane’s words, it was like a kaleidoscope flashed over Darcy’s vision. There was a halo around Jane, she watched it flash an angry red color. “You’re lying,” Darcy said, shaking her head, “you don’t know if I’m going to be alright.”

“There’s a lot we’re not sure of,” Steve said, drawing her gaze again. “We just want to make sure you’re somewhere safe. Then we can work together on figuring out what happened.”

Steve Rogers glowed a brilliant gold with just a hint of blue, beautiful and honest, and she shook her head to clear the colors. He really did believe they were going to be able to help her. Or at least he’d deluded himself enough. Either way, she was glad for the heavy optimism he seemed to hold.

“Did we at least take down Ivan Ooze Guy?” When no one said anything, she frowned. “Ivan Ooze? Bad purple oozey guy from the Power Rangers movie? Come on, nobody?”

Thor grinned down at her. “It was not us, Lady Darcy, but you. Bravely and solely.”

She looked up at the god suspiciously. Even knowing she’d be able to tell if he was lying, she _still_ didn’t believe it. “Bullshit.”

“It’s true. It’s ridiculous and outside the realm of _anything remotely possible_ , but it’s true.” 

Darcy decided she liked annoying Tony Stark.

“Well then. Score one for Team Stupid!” she said, throwing her still-glowing hands in the air. When she heard a snort sound from the back of the room, she leaned around Stark so she could see where it’d come from. A man with dark hair was leaned against the wall, hiding the laugh he’d just made behind his metal hand.

“Whoooooaaaa.” He was bathed in red swirls, tinged black, with a silvery undercurrent of cobalt, a perfect match for the blue Captain America carried. “So pretty.” The man wasn’t hard to look at, either. _Not man_ , she thought to herself, _that’s the Winter Soldier_.

The entire room’s eyebrows knit together and followed her line of sight, casting a backward glance at the man. For what it was worth, she thought he acted entirely appropriately when his jaw clenched before he swiftly exited the room. When the eyes flicked back to her she shrugged her shoulders.

“He’s pretty. I mean, I’m seeing colors. Pretty colors.” She gestured with her hands toward the slowly closing door. “Swirling around. He had a lot of pretty colors. Seeing colors isn’t normal, right? That’s a bad sign?”

“We’ll get you back to the compound, Bruce and Tony will have a look, and we’ll go from there. Sound like a plan to you?”

“Well, you _are_ the man with the plan,” Darcy said, giving him a mock salute. The wry grin he flashed her way made her smile widen. When he turned away she threw a thumbs up sign at Jane, nodding her head in the direction of the Captain’s retreating form. 

Her thumb was still glowing.

“Maybe don’t touch anyone until we get this figured out?” Jane said, taking a step closer to the table Darcy was laid out on.

“Hands-off the Captain. Got it.”


	3. Slow Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find me on the [tweets](https://twitter.com/Goddessvicky) and the [Tumbles](http://goddessvicky.tumblr.com/) !
> 
> Mostly Marvel and cats. THE BEST THINGS.
> 
> _______
> 
> Today's charity? [Boys and Girls Club](https://www.bgca.org/)! Click to find your LOCAL branch and donate!

“Whoa whoa whoa. **Slow down**. Pump the breaks. You’re saying I have _alien_ DNA? That’s so fucking messed up!”

“Nobody said alien.”

“Somebody said alien.”

“ _Nobody said alien_.”

Darcy held her slightly glowing hands in front of her, eyes wide and innocent as she looked at Tony. “Fine, jeez, no one said alien. But no one said _human_ either.” She turned to Bruce. “So what’s the what, doc? Give it to me straight.”

“As I’ve said, Ms. Lewis -”

She gave him a look. “Darcy, please. Ms. Lewis was an egg donor who _apparently birthed an alien_!” She smirked to herself when Tony threw up his hands and turned his back in frustration. She saw Jane roll her eyes in her peripheral vision; Darcy’d always been good at pushing people’s buttons, it wasn’t her fault that Tony Stark had so many.

“Your DNA is different than a full human’s, yes, but the term ‘alien’ means something not of this earth and you _are_ of this earth. You’re just not _fully_ human. And it seems that’s why you were able to absorb the gem.”

Darcy blinked at Bruce. “So I’m… what? Some sorta freak of nature?”

“A mutant,” Jane said, a bit too happily. At Darcy’s glare, her friend gave her a wane smile, “but a nice one?”

Darcy frowned. “No one likes being called a mutant.”

“There are worse things to be called.”

Once again the man with the metal arm, with all his dark swirling colors, became the focus of the eyes around the room, and she watched everyone light up as they looked at him. Almost everyone was filtered a light brown. Inquisitive. Questioning. Tony Stark was bathed in a sea of black as he regarded the other man ( _interesting_ ). Steve Rogers, who had been sitting quietly next to Barnes and looking unnecessarily hot, continued with his brilliant gold glow, a line of cobalt connecting the two men.

“Thor, Big Guy, help me out.” Darcy turned to the Norse god, her eyes imploring. “What’s the what? This gem? What’s it do?”

“It’s the Soul gem,” he offered, “arguably the most powerful of the infinity stones. The ability to see souls, to steal them, to trap them. To have the soul gem is to _control_ souls. Or, depending upon the wielder, destroy them.”

Darcy looked up at Thor, repeating his words over in her head. _Control souls? Trap souls? **Destroy** souls!? No. Fuck. No._

Her heart started to thunder in her ears, her skin breaking into a cold sweat. The room was spinning and her tongue was suddenly too big for her mouth. She couldn’t catch her breath, her hands convulsing into fists as she reeled and cartwheeled closer to the edge. 

_This is too much, this is all too much. I just wanted to save everyone. I can’t handle this. I don’t want this._ “Fuck, I’m gonna be sick.” 

“We should -”

“No! Don’t touch her! We don’t know -”

“We can’t just let her -”

“Hey. Hey! _Don’t_ -”

Darcy blinked, her vision in dizzying colored streamers. She felt a firm hand press against her sternum. “I’m gonna pass out,” she groaned.

“No, you’re having a panic attack.”

“‘s a bad one.”

“Breathe. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Do it. In through your nose.”

Darcy shook her head, swallowing hard. “Can’t.Too much, ‘s too much. I’m not -”

“Doesn’t matter what you are, matters what you do. And right now you need to take a breath through your nose and push it out your mouth.”

It took her another second before she could comply, sucking a deep breath in through her nose and letting it out through her mouth, lips shaking with the effort. The hand that had been pressed to her chest moved so it was gripping her shoulder. 

Strong. 

Safe. 

An anchor.

“Do it again. In. Out. Again.”

As she sat there, eyes screwed shut, focusing on her breathing, Darcy was certain she’d never done anything this monumentally stupid. If she’d known what would happen when she touched that stone, would she have? Maybe. Probably. Yes. Fuck, yes she would. Damn it.

Not knowing how much time had passed, Darcy opened her eyes, only seeing colors but knowing who was there before she saw his face. Eventually the swirl of hues faded and she was left looking into Barnes’ blue-grey eyes. “You probably shouldn't touch me, soldier.”

He pulled his hand from her shoulder and wiggled the metal fingers. “Figured I was pretty safe, all things considered.”

The laugh that broke free from her chest was breathless, and Darcy was happy she hadn’t embarrassed herself by vomiting or fainting. She tore her gaze from Barnes’ face and looked over his shoulder. Steve Rogers was standing just behind him, worry and concern in his eyes. Not for _her_ , she realized, but for the man who’d touched her, even when everyone had said not to.

Smiling softly, she let out a shaky breath, gaze landing on Bucky once more. “You thinking of signing up for Team Stupid? We have a few openings.”

“Are you kidding? The jerk’s been training his whole life for that unit.”

Darcy looked up at Steve’s words, watching as he squeezed Bucky’s shoulder, the worry softening in his eyes, leaving him sporting an amused smirk.

“After you, punk.”

Darcy waved her hand at both of them. “Alright, alright. Stop fighting over me. You’ve both made the team.” She watched the tiniest hint of a grin pull Barnes’ lips upward.

“Hey, your hands aren’t glowing anymore.” 

Darcy glanced at Jane and then her hands, which had returned to normal. “Will you look at that.”

“Maybe you get some rest and we start again tomorrow?”

She could already feel the exhaustion in her bones, her eyelids feeling like hundred-pound weights. Passing out sounded like a great plan. “Yes. That.”


	4. Separation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for the feedback everyone! Makes me happy people are enjoying reading it as much as I am writing it!
> 
> Today's awesomesauce charity is the [Be The Match - National Marrow Donor Program](https://bethematch.org/)! It's a little different than a normal charity, as they want you to register as a bone marrow donor and not necessarily give them money, but it's amazingly important. The opportunity to change or save someone's life? I've been registered for years and can only hope one day I'll find a match. Check them out for your free kit!

Darcy hadn’t seen Jane in days and she was beginning to feel adrift, not enjoying the forced **separation** from her best friend. She knew the Avengers (as well as anyone who watched them on TV could), but she didn’t really _know_ them, and that left Darcy scared, bored, and full of a billion other emotions.

She’d tried explaining the wavy colors that seemed to be everywhere, having to really _focus_ to get them to go away, but they hadn’t found anything wrong with her eyes and, at current, she was watching Tony Stark and Bruce Banner argue over her latest blood work and brain scans.

Darcy leaned back in her chair, directing her closed eyes upward. It didn’t matter if she had her eyes closed or not, she could still see the vibrant paints. They were _everywhere_ and she realized that, if asked, she’d be able to point out where everyone was on a schematic map of the building. 

Soul gem, indeed. She could see all of them, dark and light, heavy and weightless, drifting through space. Just when she thought she’d start getting dizzy and begin to feel the overwhelming truth of it all, she saw a shiny gold make its way into the room, taking up the seat next to her and catching her attention.

Darcy opened her eyes and smiled at Steve. “Captain.”

“You can call me Steve, Darcy.”

“Don’t know you well enough to call you Steve, Captain.”

“From our debrief it looks like we’ll get the chance to change that. They’re already setting up a permanent suite for you.”

Taking a deep breath, Darcy turned to glare in Tony and Bruce’s direction. “So it looks like this vacation is now becoming a _stay_ cation? Didn’t think to let _me_ know that?” At least Bruce felt guilty, she could see it. Tony’s colors (aura? She supposed she’d need to think of a term for the swirls that surrounded everyone...) stayed exactly the same.

“Do you know what the full extent of your powers are?”

“No.”

“Do _we_ know what the full extent of your powers are?”

“Not unless you’ve been keeping _that_ from me, too.”

“Are you certain you’d not be a threat to the general populace if you went back to the city?”

The glare was still on her face, but she took a deep breath in through her nose and out through her mouth, just like Barnes had instructed her days ago. “No. I’m not sure if I’m safe.”

“Great. Then you stay here with us and we figure out what to do about it. It’s for your safety as much as it is everyone else’s.”

As much as she wanted to be angry at Tony for the matter-of-fact way he was talking, she (begrudgingly) admitted he was right. The last thing she wanted was to hurt anyone. She slowly swiveled her chair back to Steve, letting Tony and Bruce continue to bicker in the background.

“So I haven’t really gotten a chance to see the compound, outside of the sparsely decorated medical ward. Mind showing a girl around? Give me the five-cent tour?”

“Of course.”

*~*~*~*~*

The Avengers compound was just that, a _compound_ , and there was no way she’d remember where half the stuff was. Communal kitchens, weight rooms ( _pffft_ like she’d ever use them), a headquarters for communications… It was sprawling, and giant, and _a lot_.

“It can be overwhelming, I know. Tony’s A.I. is going to get an update for you. Just call out and she’ll get you where you need to go.” 

“Fancy.” 

Darcy slowed to a stop when Steve did, watching him point to a door on their right. “This is you. Door opens to your thumbprint. Only a handful of people have access other than you, and none of them will use it for anything other than an emergency.”

She looked down at her feet, scuffing the ground with her toe. “That include you?” Her eyes flicked up for his answer.

That wry grin bloomed on his lips again, his gold strobing the slightest bit. “I’m one of them, yeah.”

“Good to know. And you’re...?” She pointed to a door directly across the hall from hers. When he gave her a questioning glance - not _suspicious_ but surprised - she waved her hand in the air. “Your color bleeds a bit brighter than everyone else’s.”

“Oh.” He nodded, seemingly accepting that as a good enough answer. 

“Not every day you get to sleep next to Captain America and the Winter Soldier,” she joked. A second later Darcy realized the slip of her tongue and felt her cheeks flame with embarrassment. “I mean, _live next door_ to. Not sleep.” As he grinned, Darcy almost willed the floor to open up and swallow her. 

She thought better of it, though. What if it actually _did_? Better safe than sorry.

“Can I ask? How you knew Bucky and I…”

“Live together?” He nodded. “I can see him standing on the other side of the door.” 

She heard a muffled swear from inside. Steve laughed and she couldn’t help how her smile brightened at the sound.

“Well, I’m going to check out my new digs. I’m sure I’ll see you around. Thanks for the tour.” She pressed her thumb to the door handle and heard the shift of metal as it unlocked.

“Darcy?”

“Hm?”

“If you don’t mind me asking… what color? I mean, when you look at me with -”

“My _all-seeing_ eyes?” Another nod, another sheepish look that made her heart flip at his brand of handsome. “Gold. Bright. With a swatch of cobalt. You share the blue with Barnes.” She saw the look on his face. “Not quite the _red, white, and blue_ you were expecting?”

“No,” he smiled, “but I like it better.”

She smiled back. “Me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, you can find me on the [tweets](https://twitter.com/Goddessvicky) and the [tumbles](http://goddessvicky.tumblr.com/)!


	5. Challenged

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's charity? [Dogs on Deployment](https://www.dogsondeployment.org/)! So this organization is for active duty military who want to have their pets taken care of while they're deployed, wherever that may be. The thought of leaving my fur babies and not knowing what could happen is terrifying, and it's definitely not a stress our military should have to worry about! So visit their webpage, donate, and maybe offer to foster if you're able!

“It’s made to hold the Green Guy, you’ll be fine.”

Darcy glared at Tony through the glass, or plastic, or whatever it was he claimed was safe enough to hold her and whatever ability was about to be tested. “Does the Hulk have a soul?”

“Hey!”

Darcy grinned sheepishly at Bruce. “No offense. Just… It’s weird because I know you’re, like, two different beings or whatever, but I don’t see two souls when I look at you.” She gasped and snapped her fingers toward him. “What if you’re _not_ two different beings after all?”

“No one said he’s two different beings. Nobody has ever said that. Will you stop stalling and just take it up to an eleven?”

She rolled her eyes at Tony and held up her hands. She watched them flash with amber light, wisps of smoke that her fingers could run through. “To an eleven?” She’d never been one to back down once she’d been **challenged**.

“Sure. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“Tony! No. Hey, Darcy, look at me.” Darcy’s gaze shifted at the sound of Steve’s voice, hazel eyes flicking up to hold his. “Just... be careful. Let your body do what it _wants_ to do.”

 _Easier said than done, Captain,_ she thought, _because my body has shit for brains._ She threw him a stilted nod before looking back at her hands. “Right. Here goes. If I die, have Jane clear my browser history.”

Darcy closed her eyes, letting the part of her mind that held the colors take over. She gasped as she felt an ocean of lines spread from her body in all directions, an infinite sea of souls. They hung around her like threads; some she could feel go on forever, others terminated nearby. When she looked down at her body (was it still _her_ body or was it something so much more now?) she could almost see the lines, so bright and so clear. She reached out to pluck at one like a guitar string.

A reverberating shock wave traveled outward along the thread. She tried to follow it with her eyes, but it wasn’t really her _eyes_ that were seeing it in the first place. She traveled the string, a straight line, needing to see where it ended, needing to know _who_ it ended at. It didn’t take her long, only a fraction of a second, but what was time when you could see the whole of the beings in the universe?

The end of the line. _He_ was there, down the hallway, a swirl of crimson and charcoal, and she watched, with eyes she didn’t need and a mind that wasn’t hers, as his body felt the impact of the ripple. Barnes grabbed the wall as he stumbled, mouth parting, eyes wide and unfocused as his pupils flashed amber, looking for the source of the attack.

Was it an attack? She didn’t mean it to be. Darcy had no idea what any of this meant, what she could do. Was she hurting him? _Could_ she hurt him? The second she thought it, she knew that she could. She could reach in, rip his soul away, and it would feel _good_. She _wanted_ to do it.

No. No, she didn’t. She couldn’t extinguish his light. She just couldn’t. It wasn’t her. She didn’t want to hurt him, but _it_ did. _It’d_ be happy to hurt him, to carve him up and swallow him whole. _It_ was hungry and he tasted delicious.

The thought of hurting him, of hurting _anyone_ , formed a scream in her throat and a pain in her chest. Darcy watched Barnes regain his footing, push off the wall, then break into a sprint. 

She was thrown back into her body, but she was too big now, too massive. There were too many voices, too many lines, and they were strangling her. She was drowning, being hollowed out, and she had a second to wonder what was going to fill back into her when she was gone.

When Darcy opened her eyes, she could see nothing but amber-orange, too bright and blinding. She shook her head, flicking the colors from her vision, leaving just her eyes. Barnes was there on the other side of the barrier, his fists pounding on the cage, mouth screaming something she couldn’t hear.

Darcy tried to answer him, tried to speak, or blink, but there was nothing but _everything_ and she was terrified. 

_Oh. Fuck. Oh, fuck, what did I do?_

She tried to pull herself together, to pull her own consciousness back from where it’d been flung throughout the universe. There was no way she’d get it all back. She was going to lose bits of herself, piece by piece.

Gritting her teeth, Darcy thought about herself. All her flaws. All her strengths. Her sense of humor and her beliefs. She needed _all_ of it, every piece, and she didn’t want to give up a single cell of herself, not to this stone, not to _any_ thing.

Her ears popped as a wave of energy blasted from the very center of her, filling the confined space. She breathed deeply, trying to capture every bit of dusty orange, every flicker of amber, every single piece of herself, but something had changed.

She sagged to her knees, head hanging low, utterly exhausted. She felt someone grab her, cradle her in their lap.

“What are you doing! Don’t touch her!”

“She already touched me.”

Had she? Had she already touched his soul? Was it hers?

“Not mine,” she breathed, her vision cleaning to see Barnes’ face looking down at her, confusion and concern in the grey of his eyes. Her arm felt impossibly heavy as she lifted it, poking his chest. “Yours.”

Blackness, once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is so much story here (and in my head) that isn't getting told due to the size constraints (though I *love* drabbles!) so I'm planning on writing this to completion (15 days, 1000 words a day, 15,000 word story) but I'll be not only continuing this in a full-sized (let's face it, epic word count) fic, but giving the other character's points of view as well.  
> So... that'll happen after this is done.  
> Yay! Something to look forward to!
> 
> You can find me on [Tumblr](http://goddessvicky.tumblr.com/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/Goddessvicky)!


	6. Boundaries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's glorious charity is CARE! [The Center of Animal Research and Education](http://carerescuetexas.com/about-care/) is a non-profit organization dedicated to education, research, rescue, and long-term care for exotic animals. Located in Texas CARE currently provides a permanent home to over 40 animals including mountain lions, African lions, tigers, black and spotted leopards, bobcats, ring-tail lemurs, llamas, and a coati.
> 
> The animals of CARE come from a wide variety of places. Some of the animals were abused, abandoned, or bred to be exotic pets before they came to the facility. Others were retired from shows and traveling, sent from other facilities that needed help, or were simply unwanted by private collectors. Regardless of an animal’s origins, they are all given tremendous love and world class husbandry when they find a home at CARE.

Darcy was getting real sick and tired of waking up with a bunch of people looking down at her. Her cheek was pressed against something warm, and she groaned as her gaze moved from person to person.

“I had a dream. And you were there. And you were there. And you were there…”

The people gathered breathed a collective sigh of relief. Bruce readjusted the glasses on his nose. Tony gave her a smirk. Steve was looking at her, so handsome, the only man she’d ever loved.

Her brain supplied its own record-screech sound effect.

“Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.”

She remembered seeing the ‘Wizard of Oz’ in the theater when it was first released. But that wasn’t her memory. It was -

“Bucky,” she gasped, sitting up. He was there, behind her, the thing her cheek had been resting on. She’d drooled on him. Sweet MamaJama, she’d been drooling on the Winter Soldier. Moving so quickly made her head spin a bit and she reached up to grab it. “ _Owwww_.”

She jumped when she felt a warm hand on her cheek. She blinked twice, quickly, only getting a glimpse of the color world before she pushed it away (was she getting better at it? Sweet!) and saw Bucky there, whole and him with all the soul bits. Darcy threw her arms around him, squeezing tightly.

“I thought I’d taken you, stolen something.” She pulled back enough to see a guarded look in his eyes, the expression making the smile on her face falter.

“I think you did. A little.”

 _Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck!_ After everything he’d been through, the torture, the years, the pain, every face, every kill, every death, and she’d gone and taken something of his soul. She felt her face crumble, her bottom lip shaking.

“Hey, hey now,” he cradled her face in both of his hands, thumbs running over her cheekbones, ready to catch the tears if they fell. “I think you gave me a little of yours.”

At his words, she blinked and finally saw it; the swatch of crimson that was him, as well as the vein of blue he shared with Steve, but where there’d only been ash, blackish grey at the edges, she could make out the smallest hint of green. “That’s me?” She knew he couldn’t see it, the colors, but somehow he knew what she was talking about. Because he _had_ seen it, just through _her_ eyes.

He nodded. “I think so.”

“And you’re…” He nodded again. _Oh._ “Fuck. I’m sorry.”

“Darce, it wasn’t your fault.”

“No, but it _was_ me.” The look he gave her was one she’d seen in the mirror one too many times. A Darcy Lewis Look™ on his Bucky Barnes face. “I know. I did it, but it wasn’t _me_. I know. Doesn’t make it easier.”

“I know.”

Something in her chest eased at the small smile he gave her, a sigh lifting her shoulders as she leaned forward and pressed her forehead to his.

“Seriously? Are we just ignoring _all_ personal **boundaries** now? Hey! Hello, hi!?” She turned toward Tony as he waved his hand in her face, feeling Bucky do the same. “Mind letting the rest of us in on your little gab session? We’d like to know if we need to put the base on lockdown.”

She turned back toward Bucky, letting out a soft laugh as she attempted to extricate herself from his lap. When she’d settled herself beside him, bodies touching from knee to hip, she tried to think of a way to explain something _she_ didn’t even really get.

“I did what you said. Let my body do what it wanted. And what it wanted to do was to show me souls.”

“ _Our_ souls?”

She gave Bruce a look, “ _all_ the souls. The whole universe. Every sentient being, the ones that have a soul, I guess. Can a sentient being _not_ have a soul? I don’t fucking know. There was an epic shit ton of souls, okay? And I felt them. Then I reached out and touched one that was close. And that…” she trailed off and gestured pathetically in Bucky’s direction.

“You touched his soul.” She didn’t like the way Tony had said it, but she nodded all the same. “Ah. Great. Awesome. Totally clears that up.”

“Hey!”

“It’s okay, Buck.” She reached out and squeezed his knee. “There was something there, the stone, I think, and it was hungry, so I had to suck myself back in before I got lost or before something else got in me first. And then -”

“ - I could feel her, the part of _her_ in _me_ leaving room for something else. So I gave her a part of me so that didn’t happen.”

Saying it out loud was somehow worse. Everyone was quiet, looking at her and Bucky with uncertain expressions. She gasped when she felt a stabbing pain in her chest, the sound covered up by the scraping of Steve’s chair on the floor as he stood up and left the room without a word.

Darcy’s hand pressed to her sternum, feeling like there should have been some wound to cover. She risked a glance at Bucky, seeing the guilt filling his eyes. “Fuck,” she breathed, reaching out to squeeze his hand, “I didn’t mean -” 

“I’ll talk to him,” Bucky said, eyes sliding to hers, squeezing her hand quickly before following Steve from the room.

She looked between the rest of the people in the room. 

“For the love of Frigga, can _somebody_ get Jane in here? Like, now? Now! _Right now_!” Once the tears started, they wouldn’t stop. This was too much. _Too too much._ She curled up as the sobs came quicker, wracking her body. _What did I just do?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find me on [Tumbles](http://goddessvicky.tumblr.com/) and [Tweets](https://twitter.com/Goddessvicky)!
> 
> P.S. - the amazing [Ritamej](http://ritamej.tumblr.com/) made me art! I squealed like a dolphin and flapped my hands! Look how pretty!!  
> [](https://imgbb.com/)


	7. Summer Haze

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's Charity: [The Animal Welfare Institute](https://awionline.org/content/join-us)! The safety and welfare of animals are near and dear to my heart and this charity makes sure the money you donate ACTUALLY GOES to the animals. If you have the means, please donate!

She was dreaming. Or remembering. It was hard to tell these days. Everything seemed to blend together. Darcy knew what memories were hers, and what were Bucky’s, but the _feeling_ that accompanied them both were… heavy. And real. So, so very real.

She was being avoided, and it hurt. She knew why, could even agree that there’d been a line and she’d crossed it (like she always did), but it didn’t make her ache any less for a man she’d only just met and known for the whole of her life.

“Sergeant Barnes is at your door. Would you like me to let him in?”

Darcy blinked at Friday’s voice, gaze sliding toward her door. She blinked again, letting the colors bleed into her world, and there he was. Crimson, charcoal and cerulean, with just a hint of chartreuse at the edges. He hadn’t knocked, content to stand on the other side. “Yeah,” she answered, hearing the metal lock slide open. 

She watched him stand there for a few more seconds, no doubt debating whether he was actually going to enter or not. Finally, he pushed the door open, stepping silently into the room and letting the door fall closed behind him. Darcy looked at him, the darkness and guilt bare in his eyes. It wasn’t like she knew his _current_ thoughts, but she knew _him_ and knew he was blaming himself. Just like she was.

“Come here,” she said, holding a hand out to him. He hesitated (she understood why) then crossed the room, threading their fingers together. The second their skin touched it felt like the air in the room had lightened, like a weight she hadn’t known had been lifted from her shoulders. Bucky gripped her hand like he felt the same way, and she knew he did, and that only made her feel more guilty.

“I don’t know how to explain it to him,” he growled, reaching out to push a lock of hair behind her ear. It’d only been days, but his touch was familiar. The holding of hands. The brushing of shoulders. It didn’t matter what it was, touching him made her feel better. Made her feel whole. It hadn’t gone further, they hadn’t _let_ it, but feeling him beside her was enough.

“I know,” she said leaning her head onto Bucky’s shoulder. “I feel gutted. I’m scum. I’m less than scum. I’m the stuff scum feeds their scum dogs.”

“If I hadn’t -”

“Given me part of your soul? So that some giant cosmic force hadn’t taken residence inside of me and used it as a foothold to destroy everything? Yeah. I know. Still fucking sucks.”

Even though the silence that fell between them was comfortable, it still felt awful. She knew what it was to love Steve Rogers, to know him intimately, to love all of him, his loyalty and stubbornness, his absolute conviction, his desire to do what was right, above everything else. And just as she knew what it felt like to _love_ him, she now knew what it felt like to _lose_ him, too.

“Do we give him space?”

“He’s already taken that, doll. Hasn’t been in our room for days.”

“I know.” It only took an errant thought for her to find him. He was in one of the weight rooms. The first time she’d looked for him, after everything, she’d been confused; she’d looked everywhere for that brilliant gold, only to find him in a far flung wing of the compound, muted and muddy. The blue was still there, dark and strobing, but something in him was… not as shiny.

And it was all her fault.

“You remember that time he got so hopping mad he stopped talking to me for over a week?”

Darcy frowned, shuffling between the two lives worth of memories in her head. Finally, her mouth turned upward in a small smile. “It was sweltering.”

“Mmmhmmm. Brooklyn, disgusting **summer haze** , smell of garbage rotting in the alleys. Nine whole days without a word.” Bucky looked down at their clasped fingers. “He came back. He always comes back. The punk’s spent his whole life chasing after me. Guess it’s time I return the favor, chase after him a bit.”

She nodded, sighing. “I tried explaining to Jane that it’s hard for me to sleep because he’s not there. I don’t…” Darcy pulled her hand from his, running both of hers over her face.

“I’d say I’ll sleep here tonight...”

“... but neither of us want to be without him, even if it means being together,” she finished, throwing a knowing grin at him. “We’re so many levels of fucked up.”

“A hot mess,” Bucky said, shaking his head. “What a stupid expression.”

They both laughed, leaning against each other. Eventually the laughter faded and they were left there, heartsick and aching. “Tell me this is going to be okay,” she said, voice pleading, eyes filling with tears as she looked down at her hands, “tell me I didn’t just rip the heart out of three people for no fucking reason.”

“Darce, it wasn’t just you. I did it, all the same. I went seventy years without that man, I’m not going to let him go now. Not now. You believe me? Hey. Look at me.” She did, then, the first tear rolling down her cheek as her eyes flicked up to his. “We’re going to figure this out. We’ve been through worse.”

She nodded, sending more tears down her cheeks. Darcy wanted him to kiss her, to whisper against her lips that everything was going to be fine, her body aching for something she’d never actually had. “I believe you, Buck.”

His thumb brushed away a tear, fingers sifting through her hair until he held the back of her neck, pressing his forehead to hers, taking a deep breath. “Tomorrow I do something monumentally stupid.”

“Oh, goodie. A play straight from the Darcy Lewis Handbook.”


	8. Answers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys! I actually mapped out the rest of the piece! I can't believe it! All fifteen parts, 1K each day, ready to post! WwwoooooowwwwwwWWW! Thanks for all the great comments! I'm so happy everyone is enjoying it as much as I am!
> 
>  
> 
> Today's Charity: [Stand Up To Cancer](http://www.standuptocancer.org/)!  
> Stand Up To Cancer’s (SU2C) mission is to raise funds to accelerate the pace of groundbreaking translational research that can get new therapies to patients quickly and save lives now.
> 
> SU2C brings together the best and the brightest researchers and mandates collaboration among the cancer community. By galvanizing the entertainment industry, SU2C has set out to generate awareness, educate the public on cancer prevention and help more people diagnosed with cancer become long-term survivors.

“You need to eat something.” Darcy didn’t look up, even after hearing the ‘mom’ tone Jane had used. She continued to push the broccoli around her plate. “I thought you hated broccoli.” 

Darcy _did_ look up then. “I _do_ hate it. Or I did.” She dropped her fork to the plate, the sound drawing several eyes in her direction from the other tables in the mess hall.

No, not _mess hall_. The cafeteria. Darcy buried her face in her elbow, slumping. This was all a level of fucked up she hadn’t thought possible. Bruce ‘please stop calling me doc’ Banner had tried teaching her some intradimensional meditation (transdimensional? No, transcendental!) to quiet the new terrifying part of her, if only to ease the symptoms, but she hadn’t quite gotten the hang of it.

“Darce, you’re glowing. Are you sure you’re okay?” Darcy lifted her head and looked at Jane, then glanced around the room. Everyone was staring at her. She was sure she made quite the show; glowing amber, wave distortions like heat on a highway floating around her body, eyes bleeding from hazel to orange.

“I’m just going to head back to my room. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Are you sure? Do you want me to get Bruce?” She could see Jane’s worry, bleeding into space, and she wished she could give her friend the **answers** she wanted, but she couldn’t.

“I’ll be fine. Just tired. I’ll eat a poptart later. Promise.” She knew Jane didn’t believe her, but she left her there, the stares as she went making the skin between her shoulder blades itch. She’d walked these halls for months now (not her, Bucky) and she made it to her room without a thought. As she pressed her finger to the lock, she risked a glance over her shoulder at the door that faced hers.

He wasn’t there. Hadn’t been there. The space was slowly losing his color, like it was hemorrhaging gold the longer he stayed away. _Me too, room. Me too._

She collapsed on the couch, clutching a pillow to her chest. After allowing herself to wallow for a few seconds (a good, heavy, impressive bit of wallowing, if she did say so herself), Darcy sat up. Rolling her eyes, she could practically hear Bruce’s voice in her ear. ‘ _When you’re the lowest, that’s when you close everything else out. Go to the quiet place inside yourself._ ’

The joke was on him, though. She wasn’t sure she _had_ any more quiet places inside herself.

Shaking her head, Darcy placed her hands on her knees, straightening her back. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She didn’t think of the universe, or the threads that tied her to it all, or even the souls in the compound; she thought about _her_ soul. It was so small compared to _all_ the others (infinitesimal, really), but it was _hers_. She focused on it, the nugget of emerald, a vein of crimson jutting through. Even a month ago, the idea of a soulmate was laughable. 

Now? Now she could see the undercurrent of cobalt between all that green and red, and it wasn’t funny at all.

It just hurt.

Everything had gotten so complicated so quickly. But what had Bruce said? ‘ _Unpack it. Make it easier to see._ ’ Right. Unpack it. As if it was that easy.

_Sigh._

_I touched a gem and, because I’m some kind of special snowflake **extra** human, I absorbed the stone. I used the stone to turn Grape Kool-aid Man into nothing._

_The stone made it so I can see all souls. I can see them, trap them, destroy them. I don’t want to do that, but the stone does._

_I almost let something bad get into me, but instead ended up sharing my soul with Bucky and he shared his soul with me and now we have some sort of soul bond? For fucks sake, this is stupid. I love him, and it should scare me, but it doesn’t. But he loves Steve, and **I** love Steve but Steve knows **nothing** about me other than I stole Bucky from him and I am a horrible, horrible fucking garbage person!_

Darcy leaned forward, screaming into the pillow. “ _This is so **fucked!**_ ”

She jumped to her feet when she heard pounding on her door, incessant relentless banging, as if someone were _throwing_ themselves against it. “Friday?”

“Captain Rogers is outside. He would like to enter.”

“Fucking let him in, then!”

The lock clicked over and she jumped as Steve barrelled into her room, his blue eyes wide with surprise when they landed on her, her mouth open and gaping at him. “What’s wrong? Friday said something’s wrong with your heart!”

She blinked rapidly at him. “I don’t -”

They both jumped when her door slammed shut, Steve spinning toward it. Bucky had his arms crossed over his chest, t-shirt straining against his muscles, jaw clenched as he narrowed his eyes at the blond. 

_Fuck. He wasn’t kidding. Monumentally stupid achievement unlocked, Buck._

“You getting Friday to lie for you now?”

“Wasn’t a lie, punk. Something is wrong. And we’re going to talk about it.”

“That’s rich, coming from you.”

“Just sit your ass on that couch, Rogers.”

Darcy tried to make herself look smaller when Steve turned toward her with a coolness in his eyes. “You in on this, too?” She shook her head emphatically. She wasn’t, but she knew for a fact this was _exactly_ the type of shit she would pull.

“Sit. Now.” 

She sat down heavily, immediately. 

“I was talking to him, Darce.”

“Oh.” 

She watched them stare at each other in silence before, finally, Steve carefully took a spot on the couch, as far away from her as he could get.

_Fuck._


	9. Maybes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys! IT'S NATIONAL CAT DAY!   
> 
> 
> In honor of such a momentous occasion, today's charity is the Petsmart Charity! You might already get your animal stuffs from there, but did you know they help pets in other ways? Besides making sure the animals they're showing at from local shelters or rescues, they donate money for all kinds of awesome animal awareness! Check them out!

Darcy blinked at Bucky. Bucky stared at Steve. Steve glared at the ground.

“Well, this is super fucking awkward.” When both boys looked over at her, she shrugged her shoulders defensively. “What? It is!”

Steve sighed. “I’m sorry that I’ve been avoiding you, Bucky. It just took me some time to accept everything. I know you couldn’t control what happened, I know you made a choice, and I’m not going to stand in -”

Bucky, who’d been perched on the coffee table between Steve and Darcy, stood up in a huff and threw his hands in the air. “Steve Rogers, the self-sacrificing man who’ll set aside his feelings for whatever he thinks is the greater good.”

“I know when I’m fighting a losing battle.”

“Oh, really? You’ve never backed down from a fight in your entire life! _Ever_!”

“If she’s your soulmate and I’m not -”

“Steve, that’s not -”

Darcy stood up, perfectly fine hiding in her bathroom while they yelled at each other.

“Darcy!”

“Buck, it’s fine. You guys can talk and I’ll just -”

“He needs to know how -”

“He needs to know _what_ , Bucky? He doesn’t _know_ me! He met me a few weeks ago for the first time! We’ve only had a handful of conversations, and those were civil to polite at best! It doesn’t matter what _I_ feel or what _I_ know about him. He has no reason to feel anything toward me but contempt! And he’s right and he _should_!”

Darcy wasn’t sure when she’d started crying but she couldn’t seem to stop the tears any more than she could stop the words as they fell from her lips. “It doesn’t _matter_ that I know what his favorite color is, or his favorite song, or the way the light came through the window in the apartment on Leaman, or the way Sarah took her tea. That shit doesn’t _matter_ because all he knows is I’m a pushy little lab monkey who hijacked the love of his life!”

She pressed her palm over her mouth, stifling a sob before it could escape. Her face fell further as she watched Bucky flinch at the word ‘hijack’. “Aw, fuck, Bucky, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean -”

Darcy wanted to close the distance between them, kiss him until he forgot the memories she’d just brought to the surface, chase all those charcoal colors away, but she didn’t. Instead she took a heavy seat on the couch, biting her lower lip, fingernails digging into her arms to distract from the pain.

The silence had stretched on forever, until she wondered if Bruce’s transdimensional yoga teachings had suddenly started to work, when she was drawn back to the present by Steve clearing his throat.

“What do you know about the apartment on Leaman Place?”

Darcy brushed a tear off her cheek as it fell, sniffling. “Everything? I know that the third wooden plank right inside the back door creaked. The ceiling flooded when Ms. Applebaum forgot to turn off her tub one night. You got so cold in winter of ‘39 that you burned pages from your mother’s Gaelic bible to stay warm.”

She didn’t know if what she was saying was helping or making things worse. “I know that what you and Bucky have is... It’s everything. He loves you _so_ much and it’s killing me to see you’re hurting and if he could fix things, he would, because he’d do anything to fix it.” 

He looked at her then, and she was certain she’d never had anyone look at her with that much focus.

“It’s killing _you_?”

She blinked. “Him. It’s killing him, I mean.”

“No. That’s not what you meant, was it?”

Darcy worried her lip with her teeth, shaking her head ‘no’, not trusting herself to speak anymore.

“She saw, everything,” Bucky said, Steve’s gaze swinging to look at him. “Not what she read in a history book or saw at a museum. I was there, so she knows. She knows how I feel about you, feels it as real as I do. And she saw everything else, Steve. Everything I did, when it wasn’t me. Every mission. Every murder. Every horrible thing I’ve ever done, and she _still_ looks at me like you do. No what ifs, no **maybes**. _All_ of it.”

Another silence that stretched out forever. 

“I’m not sure what to do with all this.”

The slightly manic giggle that bubbled from Darcy’s chest hung in the air. “Yeah? Try waking up and realizing you’re in love with two men who you’ve only known a week. They don’t exactly make how-to guides for shit this fucked up.”

She could have sworn she saw one corner of Steve’s mouth lift upward at her words, but she chalked that hallucination to the emotionally charged atmosphere in the room. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Steve. I couldn’t.”

“I believe you.”

Those three words set her chin trembling again. “You do?” He glanced up at her and the intensity in those blue eyes froze her heart.

“We can’t change what happened. And if what happened means you’re both here and alive, then I’m glad it did. The stuff we deal with on a day to day basis? It’s hard to believe a lot of it. But we deal with it as it happens.”

“What are you saying?” Bucky’d voiced the thought in Darcy’s head.

“I’m saying we take this one day at a time. If Buck…” he paused, “ _cares_ about you... then I need to get to know you better. Okay?”

Hope filled her chest, despite the careful hesitation in his voice. “Yes. I’m okay with that. Are you okay with that, Bucky? I think that’s a swell idea.”

Bucky gave her an encouraging smile. “That’s fine by me, doll.”

“Okay, Steve?”

Steve nodded.

“Awesome. Yes. Okay. Yay!”

An eyeroll from Bucky. A ghost of a smile for Steve. Both made her ecstatic.


	10. Dangerous Territory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's charity is [Meals on Wheels](http://www.mealsonwheelsamerica.org/). There has been a lot of talk in the political sphere about what our money as a country should go toward. For me, making sure no one goes hungry should be a high priority. Donate if you can. I do so each month, and it just feels _good_ knowing it's helping!

“You’re out of your _god damned mind_!”

“Look -”

“No.”

“Darcy -”

“Absolutely not!”

“If you’d just -”

“You, of _all_ people? Do you know how _fucked_ up that is? The _only_ reason I haven’t slapped the shit out of you is because I’m pretty sure it’s the _me_ in you making such a _stupid fucking suggestion_!” 

“What if he _asked_ you to?”

“The answer is no!”

“What answer is no?”

Darcy spun to face Steve. “Nothing! Just a friendly disagreement between friends.” The look on his face made it clear he knew better. 

She’d been so busy yelling at Bucky she hadn’t even noticed his gold sneaking up. Darcy’d been meeting with Bruce regularly and she was starting to think his guru-schtick actually worked. She could flip the colors on and off with a blink now. It was a little Samantha from _BeWitched_ for her tastes, but she’d take what she could get. 

She felt an ache in her body as she looked at Steve. It wasn’t right that someone she’d never even touched could affect her this much. She knew Bucky’s feelings had a lot to do with it, but she’d found Steve Rogers hot as fuck _before_ all the metaphysical mumbo-jumbo. Now she just had a wealth of memories to confirm his hotness quotient.

(Hint: It was high.)

Steve’s lips were moving and she realized she’d zoned out while thinking of him naked. She felt her cheeks flush and pulled on one of her sleeves, trying to slow her pulse. “What’d you say?”

“He asked if we wanted to get dinner,” Bucky supplied, one corner of his mouth turning up, giving her a look that said he knew _exactly_ what she’d been thinking about. “I said we’d love to.”

“Oh, you’re answering for me now?”

“Are you saying no?”

“No!” She heard him snort, then turned to Steve. “I mean a ‘no’ to him, and a ‘yes’ to you. A yes to dinner. With us. Yes.”

Attempting to date someone you’d already spent a lifetime loving but who knew almost _nothing_ about you was complicated, to put it mildly. It was made infinitely worse by being quarantined in a building because no one knew if your soul-sucking powers would erupt in varied and dangerous ways at any given moment.

Bucky was being amazing, carrying the conversation when it lulled (had he always talked this much, or was that the ‘Darcy’ in him?) and she was grateful, but she wanted _more_. She wanted to see dopey smiles. She wanted to hold hands. She wanted to press her lips to Steve’s when he said something sweet that showed he was really _trying_ in spite of the whole fucked up situation.

But _she’d_ never kissed him, so she didn’t, because she couldn’t. Could she? What would happen if she did? She’d already gone and done the stupidest thing she could by grabbing that fucking gem, so what was holding her back? Bucky’s sensibilities, probably. But she didn’t need sensible. She needed stupid, and _that_ was so up her alley.

“We did this all backward.”

Both men looked at her when the words burst out. “What?”

“Most people learn about each other first, realize they like each other, then it grows organically into something and, if they’re lucky, _bam_! Cupid, arrow, the whole shebang. But this -” she gestured between the three of them, “is completely backward. I love you both and it’s fucking weird, but is it any weirder than being buds with a Norse god and being able to see souls? No! So why are we pretending?”

She stood up and leaned heavily on her hands. She was crowding into their space and deliberately lowered her voice so they had to lean in, too. Darcy was skirting **dangerous territory** , but she was done with being careful.

“It’s not sudden for me. It’s not new or untested. I’m not second guessing myself, not when it comes to you. I have wanted you my entire life and I know that’s weird to hear, but it’s true, so fuck doing this the ‘right’ way. I want to kiss you, I want to kiss Bucky, and I’d like to do it soon. Very soon. Now, if possible.”

Steve’s eyebrows raised toward his hairline. “You two haven’t...”

She shook her head no, seeing Bucky do the same in her peripheral vision. “Nope. We’ve been good, and I am _shit_ at being good. So I’m going to stop.” She reached out, fisting her hand in Steve’s shirt before yanking him forward and closing the distance between their mouths.

Even with Bucky’s memories, the countless times she’d kissed Steve Rogers, she still felt the thrill of it being her first. His lips were soft, and he was too startled to respond in any way, but that was alright. This was a marathon, not a sprint, and the finish line was definitely _not_ here in the cafeteria.

Darcy pulled back, watching the pink tint Steve’s cheeks, enjoying the way his eyes drifted down toward her lips then flicked back up. Bucky was only inches away, watching them, pupils blown with attraction. 

“I’m going to go back to my room. I’ll be there, waiting, and I’d really like it if you and Bucky joined me.” 

She pushed back from the table, gaze sliding to Bucky for a second. Judging by the heat in his eyes, he was a-okay with everything, but she knew he would be. She took several long strides toward the door before glancing over her shoulder. Bucky was whispering into Steve’s ear, the blond’s eyes following her hips as they swung purposefully.

She kept her cool until she was out of sight, then broke into a run toward her room. _Please show up! Please show up! Please show up!_


	11. Enthusiasm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's the day! Upped this baby to a Mature rating! This chapter is pretty tame, but the next one... Whoooooboy!
> 
> *************
> 
> Today's charity is [Random Acts](http://www.randomacts.org/#)! Random acts inspires many amazing things around the world every day — from small acts of kindness, such as inspiring someone to buy a stranger a cup of coffee, to much bigger acts of kindness like building a school in San Juan del Sur, Nicaragua.
> 
> All of these acts of kindness contribute to a bigger story, a message that Random Acts embodies and promotes — that you too can conquer the world one random act of kindness at a time.

Darcy wasn’t sure how long she had before they arrived at her door. _Oh my god, I just propositioned Captain America for sex in front of the entire fucking compound. Shiiiit!_

She brushed her teeth with a finger, swished and spit some mouthwash, then made sure there weren’t dirty clothes on the floor. _You just told the man you want to see him naked. I doubt dirty socks are going to be what scares him off._ Her heart was thundering in her chest and the more seconds that ticked by, the more nervous she got. 

Had she overplayed her hand? He was having to accept a whole lot in a short amount of time and she knew it was fucking nuts. But the guy had signed up for nuts, right? Being a science experiment? Fighting red-faced skull nazis? _Aliens?!_ In the big scheme of things, having someone fall in love with you overnight was pretty mild.

Or, at least, that’s what she kept telling herself as the quiet stretched on. She collapsed on her bed, shoulders slumping, when a half hour had passed. She’d been too pushy, too forward. Doing it in the cafeteria had been a terrible idea. He worked with those people. Most of them probably worked _for_ him. She shouldn’t have presumed. She’d fucked everything up, just like she always did. 

_Good one, Lewis. Loves of your life and you just shut your eyes and dive head first and you didn’t even check to see how deep -_

There was a knock at her door. She stood. Darcy was too afraid to blink, scared she _wouldn’t_ see gold and crimson on the other side. 

“Ma’am -”

“ _Open the door, yes, Friday, fucking open it!_ ” She took a deep breath and held it as the door swung open.

She didn’t have to blink to see the determination in the air around Bucky’s body as he stalked toward her. He never hesitated, not for a second, before crashing his mouth against hers. Darcy matched his **enthusiasm** with her own, moaning against his lips, her body singing with satisfaction at finally getting to know what his skin felt like against hers. It was a release, like a bomb had gone off in her chest. _This! Yes! This!_

Darcy was dizzy. When his hands moved down her back, ghosting over her ass then lifting, she was more than happy to follow his lead, wrapping her legs around him, knowing he’d keep them upright. As far as kisses went, this was _by fucking far_ the best kiss she’d ever had. Kissing this man was like coming up for air, like oxygen, feeding her fire and making it burn brighter, hotter. She was certain that no one else, in the history of the world, had ever gotten a kiss that meant as much as this.

She gasped as they pulled apart, every nerve in her body firing at once. “I’ve been waiting to do that -”

“- your entire life,” Bucky finished, lips swollen and beautiful, giving her a knowing smirk. She bent her head forward to recapture his mouth when they both turned toward the door, more specifically to the man who was standing there, watching them. He looked uncertain, insecure, and it broke her heart. All Steve could see was someone, practically a stranger, kissing the person he loved. _Shit._

Darcy unwrapped her legs from Bucky’s waist and he lowered her to her feet. She needed to wipe that expression from Steve’s face, make him _understand_ that what she felt was _real_. Her fingers trailed from Bucky’s as she left his side, coming to stand directly in front of Steve. She looked up at him through her lashes, putting everything she was feeling into her eyes. 

“You’re here.” 

He nodded. 

“Can I kiss you now?” 

She watched his adam’s apple bob as he swallowed, looking over her shoulder at Bucky. Whatever he saw on Bucky’s face reassured him and he looked down at Darcy, giving her an almost imperceptible nod. 

“Say it. Please.”

“Yes.”

“Fucking _finally_.”

She melted against the front of his body, rising on her toes, pressing him back against the door. There’d been no hesitation in Bucky whatsoever, but she could feel Steve holding back. She wrapped her arms around his neck, making desperate noises against his mouth, _needing_ him to know that she wanted this, wanted _him_ , just as much as she wanted Bucky.

There was a moment of pressure, she could feel the heft of it in the air, and then it evaporated. Suddenly Steve was feeding at her lips, hands on her hips, pulling her closer, finally, _finally_ just giving in. He spun them and Darcy gasped when her back hit the door and he pinned her against it, lips scorching a line along her jaw. 

Everywhere he touched was flames and heat, leaving her gasping, her fingers sliding to the back of his neck, humming encouragements as his mouth traveled down the column of her throat. “Fuck, _fuck_ , yes, right there, oh god, _Steve_ , don’t stop!”

She knew from Bucky that Steve was no blushing virgin, despite the wholesome image portrayed of him, and as he trapped her against the door with his body, she could feel the press of him, hard and hot against her, and it took everything she had not to spontaneously combust.

Darcy felt more weight against her, opening her eyes to see Bucky’s dark hair behind Steve, his body sandwiching the blond between them. She both heard _and_ felt the lust-filled moan Steve made as Bucky slotted himself against Steve’s back, in turn pushing Steve tighter against her. Her pulse thudded against his lips, feeling dazed with the hunger for these men.

She was fire, they were gasoline and oxygen, and Darcy wanted to burn.


	12. Gunshot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's charity is the [United States Holocaust Memorial Museum](https://www.ushmm.org/). Please donate if you're able!
> 
> I still think this is pretty tame, but that's because I'm used to smut being at least 5k words alone...  
> But here it is! The closest thing to 'smut' that'll be happening. But in the full fic? DAMMMMNN... just wait.  
> Unf.

Her desire blew through her like a **gunshot** , leaving her breathless and aching. Bucky’s mouth was pressed to the bit of skin behind Steve’s ear and she knew it drove the blond crazy. She took advantage of Steve’s gasp to capture his lips again, tongue swiping until he opened to her, feeling his body react as she writhed against him. 

Steve was trapped between her and Bucky, two people who knew _exactly_ what made him turn to liquid, where to touch to make his knees weak. Darcy put _everything_ in her lips against his, in her fingernails as they scratched the back of his neck, pulling at his hair to expose more skin for her to run her tongue over. It was a dance they’d memorized and it was beautiful to watch Steve come apart in their arms.

When Bucky pulled Steve away, the loss of his body heat was enough to make her gasp. He was beautiful, lips red and swollen where she’d bit them, cheeks flushed with color as Bucky drove him backward toward the bed. They fell onto it, Bucky pressing the weight of his body onto Steve’s. The sight of the two of them was mesmerizing. She was struck dumb with the reality of it.

Darcy’d been away from them for too long and she felt the agony of it in her bones, feet carrying her across the room, crawling beside them on the bed. When Bucky lifted his mouth from Steve’s, she leaned in and captured Bucky’s pouting lower lip between her teeth. She could hear Steve’s labored breathing in her ear as he watched them kiss from inches away, her hand slipping between his and Bucky’s bodies to snake under his shirt, nails running over the skin on his lower stomach, feeling the muscles bunch under her fingers. 

Bucky broke free long enough to tug his shirt over his head so Darcy turned her attention back to Steve, keeping his mouth busy, sighing against his lips as she breathed his name over and over like a prayer. He answered her eagerly, hand sliding through her hair, pulling softly, just enough for her to feel the strength. She was like putty, happy to mold against him wherever she could.

It only took a second for his shirt to be tossed aside and Darcy was finally gifted with the _non-secondhand_ vision that was a shirtless Steve Rogers. She’d loved his body before the serum, the way it fit against hers at night, frail but stubborn, but after?

“ _Fuck_ ,” she gasped, lips parted hungrily as her eyes devoured him.

“I know,” Bucky said with a small chuckle, shaking his head softly. “Never gets old.”

Steve’s blush traveled from his cheeks and down onto his chest, which only meant Darcy’s eyes kept going south, another curse falling sounding when she saw his khakis stretched tight, doing little to hide how hard he was pressed against Bucky. She bit her lip to keep from crying out, gaze flicking back up to Steve’s eyes. He was looking at her and she could see the tumble of thoughts in his head, flitting behind the cerulean she knew so well.

“Don’t,” she said, leaning to press her lips to his, cradling his cheeks as she nipped at him, “don’t think. I want this. I want you.” When she pulled back, he was looking up at her, impossibly long lashes brushing against his cheeks as he blinked then sought Bucky’s eyes.

“No trick,” Bucky said from where he’d been kissing down Steve’s chest, “just need you, both of you, want to make you feel it, believe it.” He locked his gaze with Steve’s, continuing downward, pressing lips everywhere. Steve’s head feel back against her bed, mouth opening in a gasp when Bucky rubbed his cheek against the fabric separating him from the part of Steve he wanted.

Steve’s hand had fisted into her comforter and she pulled it free, lifting it to cup her breast. His eyes opened, lust making them darker, fingers flexing against her. She knew the type of woman he preferred, she knew she ticked a lot of those boxes, and even if he didn’t feel about her the way she felt about him yet, Darcy didn’t mind. They’d go backward. Sex first. Feelings later.

She was more than happy to remove her shirt when he tugged purposefully on it. Her stomach flipped at the look he gave her, her chest rising and falling rapidly as his fingernails brushed along the blue lace of her bra. Steve hooked his finger in the fabric between her breasts, pulling her down. He pressed his lips to the swell of skin above the lace, tongue dipping under the edge. He gasped against her skin, Darcy’s eyes opening to look down at Bucky, who’d popped the buttons on Steve’s slacks. Even though part of her had known that he preferred going without, her breath was stolen at the sight of him, bare, hard and ready in Bucky’s hand. 

Lust flashed through her like lightning as Bucky bent down, his tongue swiping at the bead of moisture that had glistened on Steve’s swollen tip. “ _Fuck me_ ,” she said to herself, pulse racing.

“Kind of busy right now, but that’s on the agenda,” Bucky said, eyes dark with craving as he glanced up at both of them, a self-satisfied smirk curling his lips. “He’s a screamer, doll. Make him a mute?”

Darcy’s mouth crashed happily against Steve’s, swallowing his moans of pleasure as Bucky made his hips jerk, knowing exactly how the blond liked it and moving with purpose. Between the two of them, Steve fell apart in no time. After, Darcy nuzzled his neck as he relearned how to breathe, Bucky crawling up until they laid in one large, heavily breathing pile.

“By the way, my middle name is Anne,” she offered after a moment, grinning at the breathy chuckles that sounded from both the men.


	13. More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's been... hard. Reading the news about what happened in North Carolina is horrific. I thought about not posting today, but... I have to. I _need_ to. When there is this much ugly in the world, you have to fight it with joy and love and _damn_ do I love fandom and the family it can make of strangers, the way words can make things even a tiny bit better. So today, the charity I'm recommending is the [ACLU](https://www.aclu.org/).
> 
> Free speech  
> Human rights  
> LGBT rights  
> Immigrants' rights  
> Criminal Law Reform  
> Mass Incarceration  
> Racial Justice.  
> Religious liberty  
> Reproductive freedom  
> Voting rights  
> Women's rights
> 
> Please. Donate if you can.

Bucky glared at them over his shoulder, which only made Steve and Darcy laugh harder. “Yeah, sure, laugh it up you two. Hilarious.”

Darcy leaned against Steve, both of their shoulders shaking with laughter as Bucky stirred the pot of his Ma’s marinara sauce, pasta bubbling on the stove. She gasped for air, waving her hand in Bucky’s direction. “But did… his face? What’d it look like?”

“What do you _think_ it looked like? He was pissed! It’s your fault, anyway,” he said, pointing in her direction.

“ _My_ fault? How is this -”

“You think _I_ would have called him ‘Chocolate Odin’ if I didn’t have you floatin’ around in my head?”

Another burst of laughter, another brush of skin as Steve’s arm rested on the back of her stool, his foot on the rungs under her seat. Darcy looked over at him, red cheeked and bright eyed, and she could feel her heart squeeze, ecstatic at how comfortable he seemed with her now. She could see it in his face when he smiled at her. She was wearing him down. Not like a wrecking ball, but more like the way erosion can make a canyon. Slow. Relentless. Spread out over time until you forget that it wasn’t _always_ the way it is now.

But it wasn’t like it was rainbows and kittens twenty-four-seven. There were days where Darcy was insecure about _everything_ , second-guessing every word, every smile. Was Steve just going along with it all because he couldn’t let go of Bucky and she was like his matching piece of fucked up luggage? Buy one, get one forced onto you?

It wasn’t perfect, but when he laughed at her stories, it was like sunshine. When he told her about his day, it was like her favorite song. And when he kissed her cheek before saying goodnight? It was sweeter than the best piece of cheesecake she’d ever eaten. It was weird, loving a man when you were doing everything in your power just to have him _like_ you, but ‘weird’ was a relative term. Seeing as she was friends with someone who turned into a giant green monster, Darcy had decided to just go with it.

When Tony pushed his way into the kitchen, Darcy tore her eyes from Steve (it was hard) and toward him with a smile. “Tin Man! Bucky was just telling us about the new nickname he gave Fury. You were there, how’d it go over?” The laughter quieted then faded from her face as she saw the expression on Tony’s. “What happened?” 

He placed an envelope on the table and pushed it toward her. “We were getting the rest of the stuff from your apartment. This was shoved under your door.”

She frowned at him, ripping open the envelope. Her hazel eyes read the letter, then read it again. “Oh.”

“Darce?”

She looked up at Bucky, shrugging her shoulders. “It’s Olivia.”

“She alright?”

“She died. Cancer” She watched Bucky’s eyebrows fall. Darcy turned when she felt Steve shift, seeing the look of confusion cross his face. “Olivia was my last foster mom before I aged out of the system. She helped me get into college. She died two weeks ago. Her funeral was Sunday.”

“I’m sorry.” 

Darcy smiled at Steve’s words, knowing he meant them.

“If you want to go visit,” she turned to look at Tony, watching as he shoved his hands in his pockets, “you could take one of the jets. Pay your respects.”

She snorted, though it sounded a little hollow. “Like I know how to fly a jet.” At the look Tony gave her, she realized what he’d meant. “Oh.” She turned toward Bucky, “no, it’s fine. You’ve got that thing with Dr. Cho tomorrow. I already missed the funeral. Really, it’s fine.”

“I could take you.”

Darcy smiled at Steve. Of _course_ he’d offer. He was the kindest, sweetest person she’d ever met. “That’s sweet, really, but it doesn’t need to be a big thing.”

“You should say goodbye. You’ll regret it if you don’t. Trust me.” Watching the shadows move behind Steve’s eyes made her chest ache. He’d lost so many people. Too many. Darcy’d gotten so used to people coming and going in her life that goodbyes were second nature.

“Besides,” he continued, “it’ll be nice, getting to know **more** about you.” 

She wasn’t sure she could speak past the lump in her throat, so she looked at Bucky with a raised eyebrow. She could see the compassion in his eyes, a sad smile turning his lips as he nodded. Darcy turned back to Steve, reaching out to grip his hand. “Thank you.” The look on his face was everything, and she gave him a watery grin when he squeezed her hand. “I should warn you, though. I get sick on planes.”

“I’ll make sure the plane’s stocked with sick bags, Lewis,” Tony called, slipping out the door.

*

The entire contents of her stomach had made a spectacular reappearance. _Fuck_ she hated flying. They’d passed through a storm and the turbulence had been horrific. After they landed she could hear Steve moving around, pushing switches and toggles as the plane power down.

When he took a step toward her, she held up a hand and gave him a hard shake of her head. “Nope. Don’t even _think_ of coming near me until I’ve brushed my teeth and downed an entire bottle of mouthwash.” He’d laughed.

Once they’d dropped their bags at the hotel (separate rooms, _fucking Stark_ ), she’d used her _entire_ travel-sized tube of toothpaste and changed into a simple black dress and ballet flats. The car ride to the cemetery was quiet, windshield wipers hushing every few seconds, and when they parked, Steve looked over at her, comforting smile on his face.

“Are you ready?”

Darcy took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Not really, but let’s do it anyway.”


	14. Umbrella

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's charity is [Mercy for Animals](http://www.mercyforanimals.org/what-we-do). Mercy For Animals believes that a humane society is possible. They are committed to reducing the greatest amount of suffering for the largest number of animals. Their efforts focus on protecting farmed animals—the most abused and exploited animals on the planet—and utilize a broad range of strategic approaches that seek to expose cruelty, prosecute abusers, and inspire consumers to make compassionate food choices.
> 
> I myself am a vegetarian, but do not expect others to be as well. However, I think there are better ways to process farmed animals than the methods we use today.

Somehow the rain seemed perfect as she looked down at the dirt, the smell of wet grass and trees hanging heavy in the cemetery. Darcy’d only been with Olivia for five years before leaving for college, but they’d been the best five years of her life, up to that point. No abuse, verbal or physical. Enough food. Encouragement. She wouldn’t be where she was if it wasn’t for Olivia.

She’d found it weird that she wasn’t curled in a ball, crying hysterically, because the only person who’d actually been a parent to her was in the ground at her feet. She got it, though, looking up at Steve, rain falling on the **umbrella** he was holding over them. Through Bucky, she’d already lost parents. And friends. And herself. The ‘stiff upper lip’ thing was much more Bucky’s way than hers, and memories of Bucky being strong for both him and Steve when Sarah had died flitted through her brain.

Darcy reached out and threaded her fingers with Steve’s. She smiled softly when he looked at her, a small flash of surprise in his eyes. He turned and looked back to the gravestone, but squeezed her hand and took a step closer so she could lean against him. Her eyes traced Olivia’s name in the granite, over and over, and it wasn’t until the rain began to beat down harder and the sky flashed with lightning that she realized they needed to go.

“Are you sure?” Steve asked, and Darcy knew that if she wanted to, he’d stay by her side, drenched and catching their deaths.

She nodded at him, casting one more look over her shoulder before they slogged back toward the car. When he suggested dinner she didn’t argue, though she knew she wouldn’t eat. Steve, however, ate at least six times a day (super soldier metabolisms were jacked, man) and she was more than happy to keep him company while he ordered every egg and piece of sausage the place had.

Even while eating, Steve kept asking her questions about where she’d grown up, what she’d been like in school, anything to keep her talking. It was incredibly sweet and she answered as honestly as she could, his laughter lifting her spirits, the smiles he shot her way warming her bones.

As they shared a piece of apple pie ( _sharing a piece of apple pie with Captain America? The only way it’d be more patriotic was if we were lighting a firework and it was the fourth of July_ ), she told him about New Mexico, and Jane, and Erik and her first foray into the world of Avengersdom.

“So _that’s_ why he calls you his Lightning Sister,” Steve said, lips turning upward. 

Darcy nodded fondly. “I was much more ‘taze first, ask questions later’ back then.”

“As opposed to ‘grab glowing stone and see what happens’?”

She laughed loudly, earning a few looks from the rest of the people in the diner. “Yeah, well, I can’t argue with you there. At least this time I had a good reason.”

“You saved a lot of people that day. Including me.” He held her gaze when she looked up at him, unsure why her heart started beating faster. “I don’t think I ever actually said thank you.”

“Please don’t,” Darcy said with a shake of her head.

“I kind of feel like I need to.”

She narrowed her eyes, though a corner of her mouth turned up into smirk at the look in his eyes. “How about you just pay for dinner and we call it even?”

The rain was a nightmare. When a gust of wind wrecked their umbrella, they were left running into the hotel as fast as they could, still ending up drenched. Darcy pulled her shoes from her feet in the elevator and they hit the floor with a wet slap. They were dripping everywhere, laughing at the state of their clothes.

Darcy padded barefoot down the hallway, Steve at her side, digging into her purse to find her keycard. They stopped in front of her door, and Darcy could almost _feel_ the awkwardness that suddenly descending over them. She looked up at Steve, his blond hair darker with the rain, plastering a bit to his forehead. 

He was giving her a look, like he wasn’t sure what came next. She wasn’t sure either, but Darcy knew what she _wanted_ to come next. “I don’t want to be alone tonight,” she finally said, looking up at Steve through her lashes. “And it’s not because of why we’re here, or because I’m sad, though I am. I don’t want to be alone because I want to be with _you_ , because you make me feel better, just by being there.”

Darcy couldn’t fault him for his hesitation; since that first night with both Steve and Bucky, other than kissing and hand-holding, the trio had been careful, not wanting to jump in physically again until they _all_ felt comfortable. The last thing she wanted to do was sabotage anything.

She reached out, grabbing his hand. “I know I’m not what you wanted or would have chosen, and I don’t want you to do something just because you know I want you to -”

“Darcy.” His name from his lips stopped the flow of words from her mouth, and she looked up at him with guarded eyes. “I didn’t come just because I thought you wanted me to. I came with because _I_ wanted to be here. For you.”

She shifted her weight, trying her best not to cry at the sincerity in his voice. “Shut up.”

Steve laughed softly, pulling on her hand until she was pressed against his chest. Darcy wrapped her arms around him, taking a deep breath of that amazing _Steve_ scent. 

“I’ll grab pajamas from my room.”

He laughed again at the sound of sadness she made, pressing a kiss to her wet hair.


	15. Sweet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! The final "chapter". I've had a blast writing this and I'm so happy people have enjoyed it. I've already started writing to FFF (Full Fledged Fic) and it's already at 15k words, and I hope to start posting next week.
> 
> For my last charity, I want you to know about [Gilda's Club](https://www.gildasclubqc.org/). It's a local charity in honor of Gilda Radner, a brilliant comedienne who was taken too soon.

She’d taken an entire bottle of dramamine (well, not the _whole_ botte, but enough) and was happy that she _hadn’t_ had to use any of the sick bags on the flight back to the compound. It was close, though, and she suspected Steve had flown faster for her sake. She was sitting there holding his hand, eyes closed after they landed, doing her best to let the stomach rolls settle before she moved, when she heard someone run up the bay doors.

“Captain. It’s Wilson and Maximoff.”

Darcy squinted when she was certain she wouldn’t throw up, not recognizing the man in uniform.

“What happened?”

The man opened his mouth to talk, then noticed Steve’s hand and the woman who was attached to it. “I’m sorry, I didn’t -”

“What happened,” Steve repeated, with more force in his tone. Darcy watched the soldier glance at her again, most likely because she didn’t have _clearance_ to be hearing what was about to be said, but she’d found out pretty quickly that most of the soldiers in the base were Captain America’s men, through and through.

“They were on mission in Wakanda, assisting King T’Challa, but it’s been radio silence since Monday.”

“Satellites?”

“Stark says they’ve been disabled. They’re readying the team now.”

Steve nodded, “Give me five.” He waited until the man had left before kneeling in front of Darcy. “I’ve got to go.”

She hadn’t met Sam or Wanda in the short time she’d been at the compound, but she knew they were important to Steve, which made them important to her. “Should I be worried?”

“I’d be surprised if you weren’t,” he said, reaching up to brush a piece of hair behind her ear. “But you’ve got Bucky in there.” He tapped her temple. “So you know the mission and the risk.”

She _did_ know it, more intimately that she would have liked. “I suppose asking to go along would be out of the question?” The look he gave her said more than enough. “Yeah, figured. How about just promising me that you’ll be safe and do everything you can to come home?”

He smiled, and it made her stomach roll in an entirely different way. “That I can do.” He kissed her then, and it was soft, and **sweet** , and perfect. “I’m sure Buck’s suiting up. You should be able to find him before we leave.”

She nodded, standing experimentally, then throwing her arms around his neck. Steve squeezed her, and she breathed against his neck before pressing against it with her lips. Darcy didn’t look back at him when she grabbed her bag and started down the ramp, too afraid that she’d start crying, and right now she was the last thing he needed to worry about. 

She smiled when she saw Thor coming toward her, his face breaking into a wide grin. “Lady Darcy! You’ve returned!”

“I have. And you’re heading out, I see.”

His face sobered a bit. “We are all hoping it is a miscommunication, nothing more.”

“Well, Big Guy, will you do me a favor and keep an eye on my boys?”

He nodded his head. “I swear, I will do what I can.”

“I suppose that’s all I can ask.” When he held out Mjolnir toward her, she bumped it with her fist, smiling. “Be safe, myuh-myuh.”

“That’s not it’s name,” Tony said as he strode by, shooting her a warm grin, not even slowing as he made his way onto the plane. Bruce gave her a nod of his head as he passed. 

“Hopefully your intradimensional yoga helped the Green Giant!” she called out to him.

“ _Also not what that’s called!_ ” She heard Tony yell at her as he took the pilot’s seat.

“You’re finally back and we’re leaving,” a rough voice said in her ear. She turned and smiled at Bucky, pressing a palm to his cheek.

“Ships in the night and whatnot,” she breathed, drinking in the sight of him. “You’ll be careful?”

“Always am, doll.”

Darcy gave him a look. “Even if I _didn’t_ have your memories in my head, I’d know that was a lie.”

His lips slanted as he closed the distance between their bodies, pressing his lips to hers. She dropped her bag at her feet, wrapping her arms around his neck and squeezing. She sighed and buried her face in his shoulder, taking a deep breath. “Come home to me, okay? I’ve got plans and they involve you and that large hunk over there and you know how I _hate_ waiting.”

Bucky laughed. “Yeah, sweetheart. I do know that about you.”

She nodded, swallowing past the lump in her throat. Darcy had memories of them leaving on missions hundreds of times, but this was _her_ first, and she was scared. She was scared for him, and Steve, and the rest of the ragtag team she’d come to know and care for. She’d risked everything to save them and here they were, rushing off into danger again. It was their job, and on some level she _knew_ this, but that didn’t make it easier.

“Then you also know that I love you.”

He smiled at her and Darcy could see, even without her powers, what he was feeling. “Yeah, doll, I know that, too.”

She nodded, drawing on his strength that now lived in her body, stepping aside and watching him climb into the plane. Before the bay doors stole them from sight, she could see both of them, both of her men, standing side by side, looking back at her. Darcy waved, fear and love singing through her, backing away as the plane took off. It grew smaller and smaller until it disappeared into the clouds.

Sighing, she grabbed her bag and started toward her room, her feet shuffling a bit in sadness. She hated it, but there was nothing left to do now but wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sneak Peek:**
> 
> There was a whispering in her ear. She felt it, like a hair brushing against her neck,  
> like walking through an invisible spider web. It told her what she had to do, what it would cost  
> her to use this power. She understood, finally, how this stone could turn people evil: using it  
> stole pieces of you, bit by bit, until your soul was unrecognizable, until it’s shriveled, until there’s  
> nothing _but_ the stone. It was a cost - there would always be a cost - but was she willing to  
>  pay it? 
> 
> Yes. Absolutely. She didn’t hesitate, there was no questioning. _Yes_ , whatever it cost her,  
>  _yes_.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on [Tumbles](http://goddessvicky.tumblr.com/) and [The Tweets](https://twitter.com/Goddessvicky)!
> 
> Here's some art I made people I am a geek.
> 
> [](https://www.flickr.com/photos/153295743@N05/36133302602)  
> 


End file.
